Tuesday, 26 January 2010

BK, no way


Tonight is my first weigh in.

I'm actually feeling quietly confident. I've been good as gold the last few days and I'm currently tucking into raspberries, strawberries and grapes. I think I'm going to have my dinner after the meeting too, for maximum effect. I'll try not to do what my friend does after every Slimming World meeting as she goes to KFC/the chippy/Pizza Hut as a reward.

Food has always been a reward for me. I've always used it to celebrate something if something great has come my way or console myself it something bad has happened ("I've had such a rubbish day, I deserve that pizza AND those crisps AND that chocolate bar"). That's the main thing that I'm trying to change this time round. I'm an emotional eater and I think tackling the reasons behind my eating will enable me to finally lose the weight I've always wanted to.

Example? I had a really bad day on Sunday. I drove my parents to Liverpool for them to spend the night in a fancy hotel (for my beloved pop's birthday). My ex lives in Liverpool and I had to drive past the end of the road he used to live down. The road that contains the house that contains 18 months worth of ridiculously happy memories. Memories that I can't let go of. After I dropped my parents off I started to cry. I had a lump in my throat and a knot in my stomach. I cried all the way down the motorway, resolving to go to Burger King to make myself feel better. But when I got to the turn off I needed I drove past. I drove home. And I had a lean steak with peas and two slices of Weight Watchers bread. And no alcohol.

I think that's the first time I've actually denied myself junk food in a situation like that.

I'm really quite proud of myself. Small steps and all that.


1 comment:

lstacy88 said...

hi,

I just wanted to say I completely understand your post about emotionally eating - I have recently joined SW and today had such a bad day at work I went and had a horrifically unhealthy lunch to "cheer myself up". Feeling pretty guilty now though!

Just seeing from your more recent posts how much more focused you are and how much you are achieving, well it makes me think that I can do it too!